10 September, 2012
i didn’t think it was possible to love them more, to rise each day in service to this love.
i didn’t think i could give willingly, without restlessness. freely, without depletion.
when i didn’t believe myself worthy of figs and the blue moon, there was only sacrifice and doing.
now there is undoing.
what was an experiment in intuition, in claiming toward believing, is now a living resolution.
there is time for breathing in my every day.
there is time to notice the dying moth on the windowsill, and to step back and appreciate a circle of community.
i understand the cultivators and the gardeners now. i understand the holy gasp of a ripe plum.
i understand the chemistry of our intentions meeting our circumstances.
i understand the importance of seasoning.
i also understand how delicate it is, this moment before the dew dries.
even the parts that still twist, rise up, and reinvent the day that i expected.
the tired, the timed, the strained, and the doubting–these too i offer reverence.
there is space now for all of me, mine, ours.
gently submit to it,
all of it,
wickedly revel in it,
quietly explore new
parts of it, laughingly see joy in it;
with all of you,
be in it,
this, your life.
~from the gift of it, by my beautiful friend leonie wise